The NCAA Basketball Tournament is done. Florida took home the banner. Congrats to all you Gators! We Duke fans are disappointed. Having a six point lead with fifty-one seconds to go and then losing the semifinal game to Houston is a bitter pill. I’ve always thought it was easier to lose by twenty than to let one barely slip away. Be that as it may, four basically equal teams were in the Final Four. Only one went home not disappointed.
I thought freshman Duke star, Kon Knueppel, made an unusually wise point following the Houston game. He advised fans not to let our disappointment regarding one game diminish the joy we received across the course of an entire season. The wisdom of youth. He was right, of course. The team was 35-4, won the ACC regular season championship, the ACC Tournament championship, and the NCAA Eastern Regional championship. They will be remembered as one of the greatest of all the Duke teams, and that is a mouthful. Maybe we (Duke fans plus fans of all the remaining teams other than Florida) should adjust our perspective a little. Do we choose disappointment or celebration?
Enough about basketball. What about life itself? There’s no such thing as a perfect season in that one, either. We suffer losses – hurts, hardships, and heartaches. Not everyone will always like or agree with us. Some will disparage, whether from jealousy or differing worldviews or simple misunderstandings. Certain loves will be unrequited. Others, though reciprocal for a season, will end too soon. On occasion, we will be deceived by someone we trust. We will be the object of unkind (and often untrue) words. We will experience abandonment or estrangement. Some dreams will not come true. Others will materialize momentarily, but then will crash and burn. Illness or injury will find us from time to time. If we live long enough, we will lose others to death. As the cliche states, “Life happens.” And it is not always pretty.
But, sometimes life is beautiful. There are faithful friends. And memorable journeys. And brief encounters that teach lasting lessons. And all kinds of love (romantic, familial, love of nature, art, work, hobbies, etc.). We hear music, and its majesty soothes and/or inspires us. We observe sunrises or sunsets, mountain peaks or waves on the shore, blue skies or brightly shining stars, and nature reminds us of power and majesty that transcend the smallness of some human spirits. For every person who is rude, a dozen others are kind. For every bit of bad news, there is good news available “for those who have ears to hear.” For every memory of failure or guilt, there are lessons to be learned that will help us construct healthier and happier experiences yet to come. And, the simple fact of crawling out of bed on a new morning and seeing yourself staring back from the mirror means that you get another crack at this thing called “life.” That alone is reason for being grateful.
Life happens – both victories and defeats. Meanwhile, it plows ahead at a rapid pace. Since we can’t slow it down, and since we can’t call any of it back, then our challenge is simply to decide how to deal with it one day at a time. In fact, our assignment (if we desire to find happiness) is to determine how we will view life in its totality (acknowledging that it is a mix of victories and defeats). Do we focus on the wins or the losses? On disappointment or celebration? Kon Knueppel was correct. We cheat ourselves when we allow a heartache, however painful, to make us forget the beauties and blessings that make waking up every morning worth it.