We say things all the time that really make no sense. You know?
“Absolutely true.” Something is either true or it’s not. No adjective is needed.
“Very unique.” Like “true,” something is either unique or it’s not. The word is complete in and of itself. (Plus, aside from “amazing,” is there any more overused word in the English language than “very”?)
“I could care less.” We employ that phrase to mean that we do not care one way or another about an issue, idea, or event. In truth, however, the phrase specifically states that we do care (“I could care less” than I do, is what it says.). If something doesn’t matter to you, the accurate way of stating that would be, “I couldn’t care less.”
“Head over heels.” Your head is always over your heels, so the statement is redundant.
“That rubbed me the wrong way” is a phrase that consistently refers to how someone or something negatively affected your emotions, not your body – meaning you were not physically touched (rubbed) at all.
“Awfully good.” Seriously?
“Civil war.” If you type “oxymoron” into a computer search, that really ought to be the first thing to pop up.
“The silence was deafening.” Loud sounds deafen. Silence is a moment with no sound. Therefore, those dots cannot be connected.
“A definite maybe.” Nope, you can’t have both. Pick one.
“Is that an exact estimate?” No, it isn’t. If it’s “exact,” it is no longer an estimate.
“Growing smaller.” Okay, which is it doing?
“She spoke in a loud whisper.” No, she did not. She either spoke loudly or she whispered. One or the other.
“Give me the smaller half.” (Or “larger,” depending on your appetite.) If something is “half,” then it is exactly the same size as the other piece.
“Original copy.” What?
“Resident alien.” If you’re a resident, you’re not an alien, and vice versa.
“Terribly good.” The same as “awfully good.” I guess that’s what would happen if kale and ice cream had a baby.
“Unbiased opinion.” Opinions are by definition biased.
“Working vacation.” I can tell you from experience, there is no such thing. I’ve tried.
My life has focused on the use of words. Sermons. Speeches. Books. Lectures. Blogs. A bottom line rule of communicating is that our words should clarify, not confuse. When someone walks away from an oral presentation or a personal conversation, maybe they will not agree with what they heard but they should never wonder, “What was he/she getting at?” How many times has someone said to us (or us to them), “I already told you that,” and the other person responds, “This is the first time I’ve heard about it”? Apparently a previous attempt had been made to communicate, but it was a failed attempt. Maybe there was hesitancy, timidity, or embarrassment, causing someone to choose words that were vague or subject to misinterpretation. Whatever may have happened, clear and honest communication did not.
Horton (from the Dr. Seuss story) states: “I meant what I said, and I said what I meant. An elephant’s faithful, one hundred percent.” Thank you, Horton. Maybe that’s the best rule of thumb. Clearly say what you mean (always, of course, with kindness), and mean what you say (speak with honesty). If you want to say “I love you,” say that. If you want to express gratitude, a simple “Thank you” works well. “I’m sorry.” “I’ve missed you.” “I’m here for you.” “I apologize.” “You make me proud.” No one walks away from those statements wondering what was intended by another’s remarks. So, let me reiterate what I’ve said before to those who read these blogs that I write: “Thank you!” Those two words capture the deep sense of gratitude I have for you, for knowing that you take time out of your busy lives to think about what I think about, to reflect on my ponderings. Sometimes you even comment. What an act of grace and goodness that is! So, I will say it again: “Thank you.”
Wait a minute … What’s that in the previous paragraph? “Rule of thumb”? Are there rules about thumbs? Or, have thumbs ever actually ruled? What the heck?